Week One, Day Two...Denying Me of Myself.

“If anyone would come after me let him deny himself and take 

up his cross daily and follow me.  For whoever wants to save his life will lose it,

but whoever loses his life for me will save it.”

Luke 9:23 & 24

So, today's devotional asks the question:

"What does it look like for me to deny myself and pick up my cross?"

While I am scared of the actual "picking up" of the cross, I'm actually concerned with the "deny myself" part a little bit more.

We've just started working within our budget.  

Honestly every time my husband mentions the word "budget," he might as well be saying, "Dear, back away from the dessert table, step out of the arcade, get out of the pool, put on a life jacket, don't forget your helmet...oh, and turn off the tv, 'cause it's time for bed."

Everything about the word "budget" says, "No more fun zone."  It actually screams it...wait, no, it doesn't raise it's voice because that might be considered in the "having of the fun" department.

Can you tell I'm not crazy about budgets?  Have I made it clear enough?  

So...sounds to me like "denying myself" is the actual cross I'm lugging around.  And I'm letting it get me down!  I'm letting this thing control me.  

I'm realizing how I've gotten it all wrong.

I'm doing the exact opposite of what Jesus says to do.  He promises that when I pick up this cross and deny myself, deny my desires and selfish ways, that I will lose my old life and gain life in Him in the process.  A life He promises is WAY better than this thing I've been calling the good life...running all willy nilly throwing my dollar bills wherever they land because it sounds "fun."

Goodness, I'm grateful for this devotional today.  

I've taken this whole day to process my thoughts on this verse in Luke 9 and finally had an epiphany from the Holy Spirit.  I realized that I have not been walking around with an attitude of gratitude, but rather I've been a grumpus sitting on my rumpus thinking of all the "not fun" things associated with this new 'budgetized' way of life.

Jesus promises He will save my life...and I honestly believe that He will, now it's just time to walk it out.  And I'll be heading out for a stroll in my bike helmet and life jacket "budget", hand in hand with Jesus, leaving that old yucky, grumpy me on the side of the road.  

Later Tater, me and Jesus have a date, and it just might involve some "fun."

Feeling free and it feels good!

How about you LIFERS?!

I'd love to hear what you're thinking about out there in bloggerville.

H :)